Doing Too Much Is Never Enough
But It Sure Makes Me Sleepy!
By John Schneider
Every day is different – especially in the life of a wedding musician. For example, let me tell you about a
day last month in which I was sitting at my computer waiting for my next wedding assignment. After my
second cup of coffee, there it was. Someone wanted me to play a grand piano for a one-hour wedding
reception. I responded immediately even though I had my usual questions. How many people? What's
before and after the reception? What mood needs to be established? Will anyone want to address the
guests? What's the attire? You get the idea.
So, I typed up my questions, added a note about my basic rate, suggested a telephone conversation and
hit the send button. Within an hour, the groom was calling me. He acknowledged my questions as really
good ones. Incidentally, I pride myself on asking good questions. He then admitted he would have to
consult with his bride. Actually, I hear that a lot.
Within 20 minutes, I'm on a conference call with both of them. Like a lot of couples, they were wedding
novices and it's usually when I feel more like a wedding consultant than as musician. That's okay
because it just comes with the territory and I do enjoy being knowledgeable.
Let's make a long story short and just say the "one-hour reception" for which they wanted me to play
piano became a little more than anyone expected. Well, I expected it but I've been doing this stuff for a
while. I explained the concept of using music as a background for some events -- like the tossing of the
bouquet -- and as the main event for dancing. Oh, did I tell you we only spoke about all this after they
contacted me less than a week before their wedding?
As a result of our conversation, I not only played piano and sang soft love songs in the background during
the reception, but I was also the master of ceremonies who announced the wedding party when it arrived.
When everyone was seated for dinner, I announced a few people who gave toasts. Then came the
blessing and after I played softly in the background for another hour.
After dinner, I moved from the piano to my keyboard to get the party started with dance music. Both the
bride and the groom wanted me to learn two new songs -- which I did learn – for the traditional dances
with the mother and father.
During the party, of course, I provided musical background and announcements for the cake-cutting
ceremony, bouquet toss, garter removal and a few other activities I had proposed during our initial
conversation. By the time I got home, I realized I had put in a 12-hour day for what had originally been
scheduled as an hour.
And let's get something straight! I never suggest additional time for me to play music so I can make
more money. I do it because it's the right thing to do. Couples always want their wedding and reception
to be a wonderful experience, but they don't always know how to make it happen. Most of the time, I do.
And so I didn't jack up my bill for playing five hours instead of one. I just let them do the math for
themselves. If they only gave me what I originally quoted, I would have been disappointed to say the least.
But, like a lot of couples, they did the right thing and included extra money in my payment for services
-- and they wrote a wonderful thank-you note. Thank you very much!
I guess I like to think of myself as a full-service musician because my enjoyment comes more from
helping create an “experience” instead of simply playing music. I don’t know if other wedding musicians
take the time to create an experience, but I hope so. If I was getting married, I’d appreciate someone
helping me.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to sleep.
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