Weddings on a Holiday
by John Schneider
My best friend was born on Christmas and so it was always easy to remember the date I
had to send her a card and a birthday gift. While I thought it would be wonderful to be born
on a holiday, she hated it.
“My birthday gets lost in the tinsel,” I remember her saying. “How can I compete with the
magnitude of a national holiday?” she’d confess. Besides, she also had the sneaking
suspicion that the amount of gifts she would receive would also be roughly half of what
everyone else received.
Then there was the problem of people spending time with their families during the holidays
and not all that interested in going to a birthday party to give presents when they could all go
home instead and open their own presents.
So, now you’re thinking how wonderful it would be to get married on a holiday. My first word
of advice is to go ahead and do it if you’ve really thought it through. If you haven’t it, however,
here’s what you ought to consider: cost, time/effort and date conflicts.
Incidentally, as a wedding musician, I’ve played at a few holiday weddings. It’s one of those
gigs where I automatically charge more than I usually do. Many musicians even charge a little
more for playing on the weekends. Therefore, the very first thing to consider is cost.
Almost everything for a wedding will cost you a little more during the holidays. Not every cost
goes up, but most costs do especially those plane tickets for all your out-of-town relatives.
You can try bringing some of the expenses down by booking far in advance. For example, I’m
more likely to offer a reasonable rate a few months out than if you contact me a month before
an event.
Conversely, if you have the guts to do it, try waiting until the very last minute when vendors have
nothing booked and you are a “bird in their hand.” You may end up with vendors at the bottom
of the barrel, but you may not. It’s a risk that sometimes pays off.
If you’ve jumped over the “cost” hurdle, then it’s on to the next: time and effort.
Obviously, planning your special day during an already special day could make planning two
special days in one very complicated –unless you’ve chosen Ground Hog Day.
Obviously, depending upon which holiday you select, trying to navigate a major holiday
season can be challenging. But if you can devote the time and effort to making your
wedding less stressful, go for it. This would be a great time to start thinking about a
wedding planner, however.
Okay, we’ve crossed the bridges of cost and effort. Now it’s on to what my friend was
always worried about: guest or date conflicts. Will anyone come to my wedding if I hold
it on a holiday that’s more important to them? Well, will they?
You know your friends and family better than I. Of course, if you want to find a way to
creatively invite a lot of people knowing full well that they won’t all attend, pick a holiday.
Cost, effort and conflict. Three simple issues and you’ve dealt with them all.
Okay, now it’s time to pick a holiday and there are so many from which to select. And
remember, you’ll probably have to deal in some degree with each of those three issues
depending upon the holiday you select.
Here are some suggestions for pairing a holiday with your wedding.
New Year’s Eve and/or New Year’s Day – It’s a time of renewal and commitment. It
celebrates the past and gives hope to the future. I played music for a couple who had
their dance party and reception before getting married. They were actually married at the
stroke of midnight so they took their vows in one year and started living up to them in the
next. You just have to hope your less energetic friends and relatives can stay up late.
St. Valentine’s Day – It’s such a perfect holiday for a wedding that it brings tears to my
eyes. What better day than a day celebrating romance and love?
Leap Day (February 29) – Obviously, you’ll be celebrating fewer anniversaries but think
about how rare your anniversary date will be. Selecting this date says a lot about your
willingness to think outside the box, but not necessarily outside the marriage.
First Day of Any Season – While these four days of the year are not national holidays,
they are demarcations and symbolic of the cycles of life. Each season, of course, will
inspire a slightly different theme for your wedding: Love Blooms Eternal, Winter
Wonderful, Fall Festival and Summer of Love, etc.
Income Tax Day – Yes, it’s not that romantic but it’s deductible. And don’t laugh because
I married my first wife on this date and it was always easy to remember. Let’s move on
before I have second thoughts.
Mother’s Day or Father’s Day – Admittedly, it’s a special gift to the people in your lives
who made it all possible. Just make certain it doesn’t backfire and your parents start
thinking you’re trying to steal all the glory on their special days.
Independence Day – Seems somewhat odd to celebrate independence when you’re
uniting together as one, but fireworks at a wedding might be really cool. Just make sure
they’re up in the sky!
Halloween – As strange as it may seem, I played for a couple who got married on
Halloween. Look at the photograph I’ve included to prove it. And I can say it was one of
the weirdest yet enjoyable experiences of my music career. Can you imagine what the bride tossed instead of a bouquet?
Actually, I’m not even sure but I do remember it was covered with cobwebs. Trick or treat?
Thanksgiving – I can honestly say I’ve never seen or heard of a wedding on or near this
holiday. Somebody out there should do it for historical purposes. Maybe you could get
married on the replica of the Mayflower or hold your reception at a turkey farm. Let me
know what happens, won’t you?
Christmas, Chanukah and Kwanza – Forgive me if I’ve missed one of the other major
holidays in December, but all of these holidays should be selected at your own risk.
Remember that cost, effort and conflict are still three important issues to consider.
Consider them very carefully during the mother (or father) of all holiday seasons.
There are countless other special days like birthdays, the anniversary of the day you both
met, or at ten o’clock on the tenth day of the tenth month during the year 2010. There are
dates of solar and lunar eclipses, or the longest and shortest days of the year. And there
are dates which you draw at random to show your faith in fate.
In the end, it’s your wedding day and every year for the rest of your lives you will celebrate
on the day you selected. Remember, it’s a little like getting a tattoo. It seemed like such
a good idea at the time, but now…?
Happy National Wedding Day!
